Fuckin'... FOUR MONTHS?
This astoundingly venal pile of pig shit got four lousy months for basically bullying/cozening up to a (now-failed, quelle surprise) local bank and getting over two years' worth of the average Chicago household's total income for, lemme see here... fuckin' nothing.
I think of all the unconnected little folk I've known over the years who've lost years of their lives to victimless minor jam-ups, just getting ground in the teeth of the judicial cogwheels around here, and, fuck... this is an insult.
What's galling is the crime AND the excuses; he probably would've gotten away with it if he wasn't so fucking greedy as to not just be happy with the hundreds of thousands of dollars in free money, but then trying to claim interest deductions on taxes he never fucking paid... just wow.
As for the HOW... well, he's just, and I swear this was actual testimony: a REAL BAD lawyer, a total shit-for-brains with poor organizational skills.
I'm trying to picture like a single POC mom in front of a judge for, I dunno, driving on a suspended or expired license or some bureaucratic bullshit, explaining honestly that, in the overwhelming day to day of Being Poor, a minor detail was forgotten, and please have mercy and what the typical judge thinks of that argument... and this fucking slug tried the same shit and, arguably: it worked.
Four. Months. And anbody wanna law money on him even serving that sick joke of a full sentence?
At least I'm pretty sure Old Man Daley Jr., or whatever's left of him inside that sundowning brain at this point, will find the energy to roast his shithead nephew for actually getting caught. Lord knows none of the other Daleys will ever see true justice for their crimes.